Back to reality

Well, we survived a week of sunshine, daiquiris, and snorkeling. It was tough, but we managed to make it through…

Totally kidding. Our week in Jamaica was wonderful and so relaxing. My sister made the most beautiful bride, and spending a week laughing with my family was much needed.

As usual, Josh took the opportunity to practice taking pictures. The guy likes learning new skills more than anyone…ever.

Christie and Ken Nichols

But I have to say, the coolest part of the trip was when it rained for 2 straight hours right when Christie started getting ready for the wedding. We were all nervous, but in the end it produced the most vibrant, beautiful, DOUBLE rainbow we’ve ever seen. Of course I couldn’t help think of Genesis when God set a rainbow before Noah to promise life and to represent His covenant with mankind. I love rainbows and the hope they bring for me, and now I have one more reason to love them.

Being reunited with my family was amazing, but it made the reality of living 2500 miles away from them way too real. 7 days was not enough. I have been more homesick then I’ve ever been after boarding the plane back to Portland.

Not only that, but I miss my friends from Georgia dearly. We had 2 layovers in Atlanta on our way to and from Jamaica, and spent most our time there with Josh’s family. It was painful to be so close to so many people I love, but not get to give them a hug or see their face. And the little time I did spend with loved ones was too sweet to be cut so short. (That’s you, Anna Fulton!)

Okay I’m done whining now.

Since arriving back in Portland, I have been absolutely haunted by a verse that I haven’t even read in forever. It kept popping into my head, so finally I looked it up.

“As they were walking along the road, a man said to him, “I will follow you wherever you go.”Jesus replied, “Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.”He said to another man, “Follow me.”But the man replied, “Lord, first let me go and bury my father.”Jesus said to him, “Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and proclaim the kingdom of God.” Luke 9:57-60

Through a couple different revelations I’ve realized that much of the reason living here is difficult for me is because of my desire for a home. Not necessarily Georgia or a picket fence, but a feeling of home and security. Some days I cling to my hope in Christ enough to stay grounded, but some days I show my feelings of insecurity in wanting things of this world, like a big  fenced-in yard and expensive stand mixers for the kitchen. Things that I think will make being in a weird city and sharing a small apartment with 4 people bearable. Things that might mask the feeling of homelessness that I have, but are not the life I am called to.

The Son of Man had no where to rest His head. Why should I be discontent with where the Lord has me when I am following One who made Himself nothing and who had nothing of worldly value? If I never feel at home here, that is okay. Home is something I’ll attain when I die. Home is my husband. Home is so many things, but nothing I can pick up at Target.

Of course I write these things simply to remind myself of them.

I’m so blessed and thankful for my family and overwhelmed with the thought that God would put me out of my comfort zone to be His hands and feet. Wowee. What a week.